Cook the bacon: In a skillet over medium heat, cook bacon until crisp. Remove to a plate and crumble when cool. Reserve 1–2 tablespoons of bacon fat in the pan.

Brown the beef: Add ground beef to the skillet with the bacon fat. Season with salt and pepper. Cook until browned and crumbly, about 6–8 minutes. Drain excess grease if needed.

Soften the aromatics: Add the diced onion to the same skillet. Cook 3–4 minutes until translucent. Stir in garlic and cook 30 seconds until fragrant.

Load the crockpot: Transfer the beef, onion, and garlic to the slow cooker. Add beef broth, Worcestershire, Dijon, smoked paprika, and half the crumbled bacon. Stir to combine.

Slow cook: Cover and cook on Low for 4–6 hours or on High for 2–3 hours.

Add the creaminess: About 30 minutes before serving, whisk in the cream cheese (softened and cubed) until mostly melted. Then stir in heavy cream and shredded cheddar. Cover and cook until smooth and creamy, 20–30 minutes. Taste and adjust salt and pepper.

Optional flavor boosts: Stir in chopped pickles and/or a dash of hot sauce. Add a little extra broth if you prefer a thinner consistency.

Finish and serve: Ladle into bowls and top with the remaining bacon and your favorite garnishes. Serve hot.